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What Is A Healthy Relationship?

When it comes to relationships, things can certainly get complicated quickly. We can sometimes begin to skew reality a bit and find ourselves stuck in a relationship that might not be the healthiest. What does it mean to have a "healthy relationship"? That's a great question to ask ourselves, and for some people, this can mean different things. However, some general guidelines remain true for most healthy relationships. For example, in a healthy relationship, your partner supports you and your endeavours. They allow you to do the things you want to do and understand that you have a life outside of the relationship –– they don't make you feel badly about taking time to yourself. Your partner will continue to validate your feelings and emotions as they respect the healthy boundaries surrounding your time and communication needs that you've (hopefully) established. Their behavior and effort are consistent, and you shouldn't feel anxious about how they might react and behave. That is, you feel secure in the relationship and don't make you question their intentions and love for you. Finally, arguably the most important factor in a healthy relationship is trust. There should certainly be a mutual feeling of trust between the two of you, and this should be a "non-negotiable" within a healthy relationship. 

Below are some examples of common trends in a toxic relationship: 

• Lack of support
• Lack of communication
• Disrespectful behavior, language, interaction. 
• Emotionally volatile; easily explodes into a burst of anger.
• You feel like you are being put down, and your needs are being neglected 
• You don't feel comfortable or safe being yourself
• Manipulative actions and words, gaslighting. 
• You are constantly apologizing for your feelings etc 
• You  feel like you are not in control
• Lack of reassurance 
• You feel like your support or love is not reciprocated 
•  They make you feel bad for doing things without them or spending time apart from them (e.g., hanging out with your friends)

Tips on how to maintain a healthy relationship:

• Be open and honest about your feelings and boundaries
• Say 'no' to things you are not comfortable with 
• Celebrate each other's strengths and support each other 
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• Taking responsibility for mistakes and setbacks
• Show your partner that you support them through actions 
• Respect each other's boundaries 
• If you feel stuck in a toxic relationship, reach out for support!
• Be forgiving 
• Listen to the other person and validate their feelings
• Be open to having conversations around topics that might feel "awkward" to address 
• Being able to compromise and communicate effectively

To learn more about healthy relationships, check out loveisrespect.org